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Learning that my Mormonism was not Christian broke my heart.

"I never realized the God that they serve is not the biblical God. The reason I didn’t realize it is because, as a Mormon, I never read the word of God."


I was born in Salt Lake City, Utah. My parents were both Mormon. Their parents and grandparents going back several generations on both sides were all Mormon. So I come from a long line of Mormons. In fact, one of my relatives was actually a bodyguard to Joseph Smith. He was the founder of the Mormon Church.

I always had doubts and questions. I would just put them on the shelf. I watched a PBS special several years and it really started me questioning Mormonism. I didn’t understand the racism of the church. Black people weren’t allowed into the Temple until 1978. The racism of the church really bothered me. I also had questions about polygamy. When I would ask questions my family would just brush them off and say; “Well, that’s in the past. They would try to explain it away but it always bothered me.

I went through a divorce and that’s when I left the church. I got remarried a couple of years later. I would hear preachers talk about how Mormonism isn’t Christian. The reason they talked about it at that time was because Mitt Romney was running for President. I would get so angry when I would hear them call Mormonism a cult or say that it wasn’t Christian. I would think, “The name of their church is Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Of course, they’re Christian.” But I never realized the God that they serve is not the biblical God. I didn’t realize that because I never read the word of God as a Mormon.

I was in the car with my husband, Joe, and my mom told him that I would be with my ex-husband, Richard, for eternity because we were sealed in the Temple and that seal is never broken. That got us asking a lot of questions and got me wanting to search deeper doctrine of the Mormon Church because I really didn’t understand all of that. I didn’t know what she was talking about. So, I got on the internet and that’s when I discovered all the stuff about Mormonism. You are taught as a Mormon not to read anything anti-Mormon because it’s from the devil.

Leaving the church you become an apostate. Mormons believe apostates are the only ones that will go to hell. They believe that even Adolf Hitler will be in the lowest kingdom of heaven, but they believe apostates will be in outer darkness. So, by leaving the church, even at that point, at that time, even though it didn’t work for me and I didn’t believe it was the one true church I really at that time had so much fear that as an apostate I would go into outer darkness. It was terrifying. Even after I left the church, three or four years after I left the church I never searched for anything anti-Mormon because I was scared. Up until that time I never realized that Mormonism wasn’t Christian. I just knew it didn’t work for me and that I didn’t feel God’s presence as a Mormon.

Mormonism teaches that God was once a man who became a God. He earned his way to Godhood. Mormons believe they can also gain their own exaltation. They do believe in Jesus Christ but they believe that he was their elder brother, who was also the brother of Satan. The spirit brother. They kind of use Jesus as the stepping stone for you to glorify yourself, not just be able to be with God but to become a God. They believe Mormon men can become Gods of their own planet. They don’t practice polygamy anymore because it’s illegal, but they believe that after you die that a man will have several wives, and populate your own little planet.

I noticed when I went to the Salt Lake City Temple where I was married that they had all these strange signs and symbols on the Temple itself. They had inverted pentagrams and the all seeing eye. Just strange things. I think a lot of those are Satanic. When I went into the Temple for the first time to do my endowment and be sealed I was made to wear strange clothes. There is a part in the endowment ceremony where Satan tells you to put on his apron. You are actually putting on the apron, you are obeying Satan instead of God. There were so many strange things.

Once I started reading the word of God I realized that Mormonism wasn’t Christian. That broke my heart because all of my family members, even still are Mormon. My parents, my grandparents, my aunts, and uncles, cousins and nephews they’re all Mormon.

The strange thing is that my family supported me through leaving the church. They weren’t happy about it at all, and we kept a relationship, but it wasn’t until I became a born again Christian and started teaching against Mormonism that they have completely shunned me. I have no relationship with my family anymore. That’s been really tough, but I’ve realized that’s not uncommon at all. I’ve actually started a Facebook ministry. I have a group of about 310 people who are either ex-Mormons or are transitioning from Mormonism to Christianity. So many of our stories are the same. When you leave the Mormon Church you don’t just leave the church, you leave family, friends, and sometimes people lose their jobs in order to follow Christ. Sometimes you have to give up everything. That’s been really hard for me because I was so close to my mom and my sister. Being rejected by them has been one of the hardest things I’ve had to deal with. It’s worth it. I would give up anything for Jesus.

Amy C - Learning that my Mormonism was not Christian broke my heart.